Yes, I admit
that much of my travels and experience thus far has appeared to be about “first
world priorities.” If we go by the
standards of roughing it, most would think I really didn’t. I wasn’t in a remote village with a tribe,
living in a tent and sleeping on the floor by any means, but that doesn’t mean
that I didn’t sacrifice a lot and still set out with all the right intentions
to do what I did. I don’t have regrets
nor do I honestly feel that the majority of the money I spent (up until and
including the internship in Thailand) was wrongly spent. (Please see my blog on “The GOOD, the BAD and
the UGLY…” to understand the behind the scenes process and why choosing a
volunteer organization online to assist me, in my mind, was worth it).
The reality
is, nothing is always as it seems. There
was the plus of having it all organized and the bigger plus was that the money
spent covered housing and most of my food.
The housing was often a dormitory type of situation, but still it was
prearranged, and I had airport pick up in foreign countries where I didn’t
speak the language and didn’t know where I was going. I had people that organized all of my
volunteer activities and who explained what was expected of me, and generally
speaking, held my hand to get me there and back home safely each day.
For now, let’s
focus on the actual experiences I had!
I am sharing not only the entire volunteer experience, not just working but also the behind the scenes of living with a host family and sharing Christmas with them.
Also, I
didn’t always get to do what I wanted to do due to the timing of the year
and/or simply the lack of organization on the ground or more commonly that the
association we were working with on the ground had far bigger needs in
different directions than what we’d signed up for.
The reality is, as you
start these volunteer projects you quickly realize that nothing is exactly as
you think it will be and that you need to roll with the punches.
Let's get down to the nitty-gritty of my PERUVIAN volunteer experience
When I
scheduled my volunteering in Peru, I was not told ahead of time that it would
be unlikely that I would be able to teach while I was there due to the timing
of the year and x-mas holiday. I got to
my project, was shuttled to a small home and taken up to the apartment upstairs
to stay the night. There were 3 of us
and none of us really knew what came next.
The next day we sat waiting all day only to be transported about 6
blocks away to a very large house that was housing over 20+ volunteers. I was given a room with about 3 or 4 other
young 20-something volunteers and I tried to take a rest in my bed, only to be
met by someone new every 10 min. and to finally see my roommate laying in bed
with 2 men and laughing and joking till 3am.
I realized this wasn’t gonna work well cuz I don’t function well at all
when I don’t sleep and am a super light sleeper. I quickly also realized that a lot of young
volunteers have good intentions but they are also “away from home” and though
the volunteer house has “rules of conduct”, they don’t care and it’s all one
big party to them.
That house was complete chaos but the woman running it and the local volunteer project called “Tarpay Sonqo” is a huge angel. She has great aspirations and has done a lot in her community to give back in impoverished neighborhoods, schools and orphanages.
By the next
day I was returned to the apartment I had lived in for one night, 2 days
prior. As soon as Anna, the head of the
large house heard that I was unhappy, she made the move. Then I was told that normally she places
“older volunteers” in that apartment as she knows it’s hard for them to live in
a “party environment” and a household where about 10 people share one bathroom
and no one cleans after themselves (honestly, I’d rather be in a tent sleeping
on the floor than dealing with that crap).
So it was a blessing in disguise.
THESE PICTURES WERE TAKEN ON DECEMBER 19, 2013
The owner of our apartment, Cecelia's son's dog, Popeye. He quickly became a part of our upstairs household. This is him taking over my mattress on the floor. The apartment had 3 bedrooms, 2 of them had one bed only and the other one had 2 beds. James and I had our own rooms and Ellen & her dad, Charles shared one room. There was a lovely looking kitchen but it was infested with termites! The apartment looked very nice overall, but there were also lots of electrical issues and we sometimes found ourselves without electrical power.
This is Popeye taking over the living room. How could you say no to this precious little soul. His "dad" ignored him and never played with him after he was no longer a puppy. The lady who cooks for the house is truly his "mom". She takes him out on walks every day. He loved having us volunteers around to come run upstairs into our apartment and visit us.
Charles and Popeye were bonding! Oh-oh, Popeye's on the furniture again, where he knows he's not supposed to be. I truly enjoyed taking long walks with the live-in cook/cleaning lady and Popeye. She had worked for the family over 10 years and was looking to move to another country soon to ironically become a "legal secretary" (the profession I left behind in the US). Her biggest concern was what would happen to Popeye as no one else in the household cared for him and he was severely attached to her. The few times over the years she took a couple days break, Popeye would refuse to eat and would sit and cry the whole time. It's amazing how smart dogs are. :)
Helping the owner of my volunteer house - Cecilia
When I went back
to the apartment, the owner of the house and I hit it off and she was grateful
that I started chipping in and helping her out with the volunteers not only by
helping her translate (as her English was quite poor but I knew some Spanish
and could help her) but I also helped cook and clean.
The local street fireworks begin! I've never seen anything like this, except for the 4th of July in the US when I was living in E. Los Angeles.
The streets literally started to look like a war zone!
But the fireworks kept coming for at least an hour!
Then it was time to celebrate! A wonderful dinner was served in Cecelia's home (she's the one standing in the leopard sweater in the pic above) and all her family was there plus us 4 volunteers that were adopted into her family for the night. After they had a wonderful meal, they all exchanged gifts. This is all AFTER midnight btw. I was also able to Skype my mom and let her meet and see the family and we all wished her a Merry Christmas back in Glendale, California - USA.
The kids start opening their presents.
Exactly what I envisioned.... albeit for only ONE day
Then the
following day was the first volunteer day and in my mind (which was actually the 4th day I was in Lima now after 2 days of being moved around and then the 3rd day spent touring orphanages).
Unfortunately (or maybe fortunately, depending on my outlook), this 4th day was the
only true day that came close to what I had thought I signed up for (ie
teaching English to improvished children).
Myself and about 4 other volunteers took a bus over 2 hours away to a
very remote and undeveloped community in the city of Pachacutec.
It sat on a hill above the Oceanside (a developer’s dream) but it was
laden with tin sheds that were people’s homes, with no insolation, no running
water, no flooring, etc (and definitely no running appliances).
THESE PICTURES WERE TAKEN ON DECEMBER 17, 2013
IN PACHACUTEC, PERU
Walking through the undeveloped roads of Pachacutec - other volunteers are ahead of me.
A developer's dream - this undeveloped land near the ocean has an entire community of impoverished people living here without any running water (a tank brings water to the community once a week) and there's no insolation, no appliances, no electric, no flooring, just dirt, but they survive!
One day of teaching in a school
environment according to plan
We went to
the local school where the kids were being taught in actual trailers (with no
a/c of course). I got to my class with a
volunteer that had been there for a while. He had handouts he would use for
class but that day he didn’t get access to a copy machine (many times they
weren’t working apparently) and he didn’t have any materials to hand out to the
class and he literally froze. So, in
typical Lucy fashion, I took over. I
decided to write the lesson on the board, have the kids come take turns to fill
in the gaps and insisted they all copy everything onto their own papers so they
could study it later. The class went
fabulously and it was everything I envisioned teaching in a 3rd world country
would be. I knew that teaching there
would make an impact and difference for those children.
Unfortunately I didn't get a picture of the actual class I taught in where the desks were tightly squeezed in 3 rows about 6 deep, but this is one of the classrooms in another trailer where they were playing some word games with kids after class.
Roll with the punches – having to
help behind the scenes for the x-mas shows at the local orphanages
Unfortunately,
it was the last day of school before they went on holiday for 2 weeks for
x-mas. So after that, every day for the
rest of the week, we were taken from one orphanage to another (which would’ve
been great if I could’ve actually worked with the kids) to watch the long-term
volunteers put on their “x-mas show” for the kids at the orphanage. It was great fun for the kids, they loved it,
but for those of us newer volunteers, we were stuck watching and really doing a
lot of nothing, other than supervising a bit and at times handing out some
drinks or food or gifts (in reality, we still helped keep chaos from breaking
out and we did help with little stuff which was an absolute needed assistance
to pull everything off without a hitch, but it was not anywhere near what I
envisioned my volunteer project to be. Luckily
I had read up ahead of time and knew that often the projects would not be as
you expected them as new needs come up and they expect you to roll with the
punches as the main reason you are there IS TO HELP!).
The remote village up the
mountainside – another x-mas show
We also went
up to a remote village up in the mountains that took hours to get to one day,
to do the exact same thing (put on another x-mas show).
This is the area where the 4 local communities came together to see our x-mas show, receive food and also some gifts.
My roommate Ellen and I. She is from TN and her 65 y/o father, Charles also came to volunteer. She, myself, her father and one other man from Canada (in his 40s), James, all lived in one house together (with the exception of Ellen, whose in her 20s, we were the "old people").
This is a view of the amazing mountainside we came up. Notice the home in the background with the bricks holding the roof down. Boy are we spoiled in the first world!
Four local communities have arrived and are waiting for the festivities to begin.
Long term volunteers start their x-mas show.
Helping the kids make x-mas cards with finger paint and their handprints (to create Santa's beard).
The cards are finished. The kids loved this project. I don't think many or any of them had used finger paint before. And they loved figuring out how it would all come together to actually look like Santa from their painted hand print to the hat they cut out and glued on the card to the faces they drew to make it look like Santa.
Gifts were given to the parents for the children and all I could think was, “what a cliché”, this is exactly what they think we Westerners do. They waited in long lines, fought over who got what and how much and when they were told that the infants got gifts but the bigger kids didn't, they fought to make sure they got more gifts for all the kids. I understand what their mindset was in this situation. They expected gifts for all their kids and they were fighting to get what they expected. But were we making a difference? I think we did a very kind deed, but it is not something that makes a long term difference, it only helps in the present.
We spend
money to buy “gifts” and yet we are not changing or helping their lifestyle,
we’re simply putting a very temporary band aid on it to help ourselves probably
feel better than the people of the community do.
The right
intentions were all there, but the end result in my mind was not anything that
steps toward long term results.
My roommate, Charles & I taking a break after hours of being on our feet helping distribute gifts, make cards, serve food and drinks, etc. Next mission.... getting back down the mountain.
So what I didn't share was the little side bit of drama getting up the mountain. We were on a large bus on a very windy road and at some point when we were about 3/4 of the way up the mountain the bus stalled and literally started rolling backwards towards the edge of the cliff. We felt one wheel start to come off and everyone started screaming as some claimed they were going to throw themselves out the window if necessary. I knew this was beyond our control and any sudden shift in weight would NOT be a good idea, so I asked everyone to remain calm and within moments the bus driver (who probably nearly had a heart attack knowing all of our lives are in his hands), managed to restart the bus and keep it from continuing to slide off the cliff. So needless to say, on the way back down the hill, no one was in a rush to get on the bus. We decided we'd be better off if we hiked down the steepest part on foot and then we could board the bus from there. It was a great idea, but very challenging.
NOTE: (Having gone on a mission in Nicaragua where I got to speak with the Peace Corp. and several other successful volunteer organizations like “CARE”, and also the local media that was following up on our mission to bring the funds to rebuild the local health center of La Dalia, the city of approx. 16,000 people that have no other health care resource than that health center that had no running water or ways to sanitize the utensils they were using on patients, I know firsthand from hours of speaking with the media, the other organizations, the doctors of that facility and the Mayor of that city that true change comes from offering “education.” Teach the people how to care for themselves, how to make crops, how to sell their food, how to protect themselves from having too many children, etc, and educate the children so that they can be the next empowering generation of their communities, is truly the answer, not the band aid of money handouts or monetary gifts). But the reality is, that most people will not give of their time, nor money, to make that happen, as they want a “feel good” immediate result, so that comes from the gifts and programs where they work with the children for a short period of time. I must say though, that my mission to Nicaragua which came about simply because I personally knew the owner of the foundation that was raising the funds to help rebuild that health center, was one of the most rewarding experiences I have had, not to undermine everything I’ve done in the last 8 months in 5 different countries, by any means. But I knew that my money went directly to that community. I literally donated 25% of the cost needed to rebuild that health center and while I didn’t do any labor to physically make it happen, my donation helped to hire the people that did and supply all the materials needed to do so. In doing so, I know that I have permanently changed the lives of 16,000 people on this planet, now having a reliable health center to go to for their health care needs).
Here we all are hiking back down the mountain. No one was convincing us to get back on the bus before we got out of the steepest part of the mountain.
NOTE: (Having gone on a mission in Nicaragua where I got to speak with the Peace Corp. and several other successful volunteer organizations like “CARE”, and also the local media that was following up on our mission to bring the funds to rebuild the local health center of La Dalia, the city of approx. 16,000 people that have no other health care resource than that health center that had no running water or ways to sanitize the utensils they were using on patients, I know firsthand from hours of speaking with the media, the other organizations, the doctors of that facility and the Mayor of that city that true change comes from offering “education.” Teach the people how to care for themselves, how to make crops, how to sell their food, how to protect themselves from having too many children, etc, and educate the children so that they can be the next empowering generation of their communities, is truly the answer, not the band aid of money handouts or monetary gifts). But the reality is, that most people will not give of their time, nor money, to make that happen, as they want a “feel good” immediate result, so that comes from the gifts and programs where they work with the children for a short period of time. I must say though, that my mission to Nicaragua which came about simply because I personally knew the owner of the foundation that was raising the funds to help rebuild that health center, was one of the most rewarding experiences I have had, not to undermine everything I’ve done in the last 8 months in 5 different countries, by any means. But I knew that my money went directly to that community. I literally donated 25% of the cost needed to rebuild that health center and while I didn’t do any labor to physically make it happen, my donation helped to hire the people that did and supply all the materials needed to do so. In doing so, I know that I have permanently changed the lives of 16,000 people on this planet, now having a reliable health center to go to for their health care needs).
How long should a person volunteer
abroad
Personally I
feel that the volunteer organizations should not take any volunteers that can’t
come for a minimum of 1-2 months (1-3 weeks is simply not enough time to help
and make a difference that affects many individuals, but at the end of the day,
if you touched even ONE SINGLE PERSON and made a difference in their life, then
you still have MADE A DIFFERENCE).
Switching gears to teach English to
girls in an orphanage
Anyway,
after I spoke with Anna again and expressed my disappointment about being there
physically (in Peru) yet not truly making a difference by helping or teaching,
she decided the best answer was to have me go to the girls’ orphanage the
following week. I was supposed to “teach
English” and I had a young girl from the organization with me to help
translate, but the girls were disinterested in “lessons.” They had bigger problems in life than
worrying about learning a few new words in a foreign language.
I tried hard
to connect with them (about 10 girls and 3 severally mentally disabled), but it
was hard to do so in a short period of time as I had to gain their
“trust.”
These are
girls that have been physically and mentally abused and often abandoned by
their families. I found out that in
Peru, the parents have a very BACKWARDS system of dealing with too many
children in the family. First because
they are usually Catholic, they will not use contraceptives. So when they get to a point that they can no
longer financially support all of their children as a new baby has entered the
household, instead of giving up the baby, they actually put the oldest child
voluntarily into an orphanage (and as is the case all over the world, no one
wants to adopt a kid whose 10+ years old, they want the infants, babies and
toddlers). So those kids know they were
rejected and left alone in this orphanage to fend for themselves.
I was fortunate enough to end up
breaking through to one girl. I recall on the first day of
orientation they kept stressing that if you make a difference in just “one
child’s life”, you have made a difference.
And I’m sure most of us have had experiences growing up where someone in
our life said something to us that was so profound at the moment that we
remember it for life and feel that it changed us for the better by having had
that person tell us that. I know I have
(it was in 5th grade and I still remember it like yesterday). So, I made it my mission to try to make
lemonade out of lemons.
I went to
the orphanage, put on a smile, changed my mindset of what I was trying to
accomplish deciding that “teaching English” was not my ultimate goal, but
forming a bond with the girls was.
THESE PICTURES WERE TAKEN AFTER CHRISTMAS AT THE ORPHANAGE WITH THE GIRLS - DECEMBER 26-27, 2013
Me & Rocio (the 3 mentally disabled girls are behind us. Lily is the one in green who's the most social and has the sweetest heart). There was one day when I sat with Lily and she and I were drawing on some pieces of paper. She then walked over to get a bottle of Elmer's glue and proceeded to cover the back of the drawing I made and gave to her, with glue. I thought she didn't understand what she was doing (she doesn't speak she only makes sounds so I had no way of asking what she was doing). Boy did I underestimate her! Then she got up and walked into their big bedroom that has all the girls beds lined up in rows (I followed of course, out of curiosity of what she was up to). She then put the picture on the wall above her bed and pressed on it to make sure it stuck. So precious! That moment was PRICELESS! Clearly she valued the picture I drew for her. It was a shame her "house mother" took it down by the next day. :(
Olga, Lily and me with one of the other disabled girls behind us. The girl behind us never spoke, would not socialize and wouldn't let you near her. She would often just sit and rock back and forth in one spot. It was very sad. I tried to connect with her but she would scream when I came near her, as she did with everyone else as well.
Tifany (the coordinator from Tarpay Sonqo that came to translate for me), myself, Mahte and Lily (I think Lily was trying to figure out how we should all pose for our picture).
I don't recall the girl in yellow's name as she was rarely around. The girl in the middle was Veronica. The lady in the background was their "house mother." This is their main room that has a living and dining area. They are supposed to study in the dining area. They have a big shower area that's like a "locker room" in a gym and they have a room they sleep in with all their beds in two rows up against the walls. This is essentially where they live all day every day.
Me & Rossio. She finally warmed up to me, but I was leaving. :(
Me & Sussett. God bless her, she was the most behind in English but on the few days I got the girls to try to converse, she was the most willing to try!
As I walked out the door for the very last time, the girls knowing I would not return, I turned around to see Mahte placing her fingers in the shape of a heart. She gave me her heart, but I was the one crying as I walked away because she actually stole mine! Such a precious girl that has lived through far too much abuse and trauma in her young 13 y/o life. I was blessed to have broken through to her and to have gotten her to trust me. It was truly sad that I had to leave so soon. :(
The truth behind the scenes of what
is happening to many of these children:
And so, one
day I broke through to Mahte (pronounced “Mah-tay”). She was 13 years old. This was her 7th orphanage. She had a black eye the day I met her (which
was not gone completely by my last day there).
She had been at this orphanage less than a month and was struggling with
fitting in with the girls. She barely
spoke a few words in English and forced me to recall the Spanish I knew and
with that and some sign language and drawing on paper, she was able to
communicate to me that this was her 7th orphanage and that she had been abused
(clearly that was evident) but what I didn’t know was whether it was only
physical or sexual as well (I’m guessing from the statistics I was given by the
program that the latter was more likely the case than not).
That
particular day I broke through to her, Tiffany (my assistant from the program
had left me alone), so I had to fend for myself. None of the other girls felt like “trying” to
talk to me now that Tiffany wasn’t present to encourage them, so they quickly
left the table and I was left with Mahte.
Instead of making our one-on-one time about drilling English words, I
would ask her to tell me words in Spanish (so she felt like she was teaching
me) and then I’d make sure to repeat them and then tell her the word in
English. And at some point, the light bulb
went off, her guard was down, and she let me in and trusted me. A huge honor, I must say!
Why volunteering for a longer
timeframe makes a bigger impact
But the sad truth
of the matter was, I was about to disappoint her as so many others had. I was leaving in a matter of days, as she had
experienced so many times before, she would be abandoned by someone she
trusted.
How can the organization help the
orphans feel they have stable and reliable and trustworthy people coming into
their lives
So, I spoke
long and hard with Tiffany. I asked what
her long term goals were and how long she planned to work with Tarpay Sonqo
(the local volunteer organization I was placed with). She was a young and bright Peruvian girl and
she had aspirations to help this organization for many years. I explained to her that my experience showed
me that these girls need “mentors” more
than they need “teachers.”
They need
people they can trust and rely on to be their friends, confidants and most
importantly sounding boards that give them the advice and confidence to
continue in life and hope to actually accomplish something.
The sad reality after an orphan
becomes an “adult”
Most of them
are thrown on the streets at age 18.
They are not fully educated, they have no real life skills, they have no
trade skills for work possibilities and you can guess what they probably turn
to for a career if they are female… prostitution of course.
Conclusion – hit or miss?
That was my
Peruvian volunteer experience in a nutshell.
It wasn’t ANYTHING like I expected or had initially wanted it to be
(only that first day in the school was).
But as they say, “everything happens for a reason.” And while I gained Mahte’s trust but wasn’t
able to be there long term for her, I did help initiate a plan to give her and
other orphans an opportunity to have mentors that will be there for them always
(local Peruvians working with the volunteer organization) while they get
assistance from other volunteers all over the world that will come and go but
will still be there in hopes of lighting up their worlds, even if it’s only for
a week or two. It’s my belief that while
my final outcome was not what I
personally had wanted when I set out on this project, it was NOT a miss. I still won.
More importantly, Mahte won! She
felt trusted and happy, even if it was for a brief moment, but many of these
children never even get that moment.
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